My Someone
by Kathryn Lucas
Summary: An Alien's view of B'Elanna


_'My Someone' _

_By Kathryn - An alien's view of B'Elanna - Set after Day of Honor_

Rating - PG

It is late; my shift was over hours ago. But I linger behind, pretending to finish things up. I have been tidying and re-tidying the same four square meters for the last half an hour.

I am trying to watch her covertly, but as each person leaves this is becoming more and more difficult. My scrutiny is going to be very obvious soon. But then as I study her, data Padd in her hand I realise that I have nothing to worry about. She is completely oblivious to everything around her.

All her energy focused on the job in hand. The look of determination, which she wears, makes me sure I never want to be in an argument with this woman. I have seen evidence of her strength, which far and away surmounts my own and I wonder in how many other ways she surpasses me.

She shakes her head slightly and taps another string of numbers into the console. Then her face brightens and she picks up her tools, walks over to the processor core and begins tinkering with the alignment. She looks uncomfortably hot, but then not many alien species can cope with the humidity of our world. She is not wearing the uniform she was in when she arrived but is instead clad in a sleeveless top with light trousers. She sighs heavily and wipes her brow muttering something in a language, which is completely lost on me. I wonder to myself what it could be; our interpretation devices have been fully configured to her language. I shake my head something tells me there are many, many layers to this woman that I can never hope to understand.

She is a brilliant engineer, which is one of the reasons I feel so drawn to her. Engineering has always been my one consuming devotion. I have worked at the planetary defence station since I left my family home over ten years ago. And I am considered a shining light in my field. But compared to her knowledge and initiative I am merely a beginner. I can't help but think there is so much she could teach me.

If she weren't leaving so soon.

She is beautiful too, strange and exotic. The ridges on her forehead, subtle but still noticeable, are intriguing to me. Her dark hair settling softly on her shoulders extenuating her deep brown eyes. She is such a contrast to the women of our race.

So different.

Not just in her appearance. I have only known her a week, but already her personality has made quite an impression upon me. She speaks her mind with no thought or care to the attitudes of others. She doesn't seem constrained by the boundaries I feel. The opinion of the crowd has always been a reluctant priority of mine. I wonder if all her species are so honest about themselves. So true to their own thoughts and feelings that the opinions of others cannot destroy their independence.

I wish she were not leaving.

I want to learn all the other things about her that this short time has not revealed to me. I have never felt such a strong connection to another person in my life. And although we have only shared a few days, and handful of conversations mostly about work, I feel ready to commit myself to her side forever. I shake my head and smile at such a foolish inclination. I have always scoffed at the idea of true love, but now? I cannot help but find meaning in those sappy love poems I once derided.

I do feel better when she is there. But underneath my disgust that I am turning to mush over a woman I hardly know. I am shaken by the hurt and anger that this extraordinary woman should be in my life for such a short time. If she is the one person for me, then surely her effect on my life will be more profound because of her absence than her presence. What did I do to deserve such a life?

Finding the one person I had always searched for, the single soul that could walk with mine.'My someone' Only to have her ripped away.

I tear my gaze away lest she catch me staring. I am so engrossed in watching her that I do not look about me as I turn and I knock a pile of isolinar chips to the floor. She looks up sharply, startled for a second. Then she sees me. At first annoyance flashes across her features, then something seems to take over, her control slips into place.

She smiles.

I forget to breathe.

She puts down her tool and wanders over to me. I try and calm my nerves and not appear the young fool that I feel.

'You're here late' She says

'Just cleaning up' I reply

'Well, I think I'm going to call it a night. Do you know of anywhere I could get a drink, something to eat?' She keeps talking as she collects up her work.I try not to stumble over my words.

'Yeah, well let me show you'

We have been sitting here for about an hour. I have told her about how I came to be an engineer. We have discussed the difference between our culture's technologies. Yet I still don't know the first thing about her, as a person.

'B'Elanna,' I ask 'Why did you decide to be an engineer? I mean my father taught me. Was your father an engineer too?'

She stiffens at my question.

'I don't mean to pry' I apologise. I want to learn about her not alienate her.

'No, don't apologise' she says softly 'It is just that I don't like to talk about my father. He left when I was young.'

'Oh..'I begin but she interrupts

'I was just always fascinated by science and how things worked' she says quickly. 'I spent hours reading all the material I could on warp theory and power systems.'

'And have you served on Voyager long?' I ask

'About four years,' she replies 'but the circumstances are unusual, I used to be a part of a freedom organisation back home. But being stuck out in this quadrant didn't leave much option but to join the Voyager crew'

'So when you get home you will leave your post? Go back to your old life?'

'Oh that fight is long since lost.' she says cryptically but offers no explanation. 'No, I've come to really feel at home on Voyager. It has certain claims on my affection.' she smiles.

I don't want that last comment to mean what I think it does. But a look at her face kills all hope that my intuition was wrong. She is thinking of this person who holds her 'affections'. It is only as the wave of pain and jealously hits me that I realise that part of me honestly thought that maybe she was going to stay. To build a home here with me.

She looks up to the stars. 'It's late,' she muses 'I've got an early start. I should turn in.'

I rack my brains for a reason for her to stay, which doesn't involve me confessing everlasting devotion. But no inspiration is forthcoming. She smiles, that wonderful smile again, and turns to walk back along the beach. I want to freeze time so I could spend a lifetime with her in the precious days until she is gone. Her ship will return for her when she completes the work her captain promised. Then she will continue on her journey to her home which lies so far from my own.

The morning is bright. I stand out on the landing pad, next to her as the shuttle glides in. The light from the sun is making her hair and eyes sparkle in a way which makes me wish to the heavens I could live in this moment forever.

The small craft lands and the doors open. The woman who steps out first, I recognise as 'Voyager's captain. She smiles and nods at B'Elanna and then proceeds to the delegation from the government.

B'Elanna peers at the shuttle doors expectantly. And when a tall fair-haired man appears I hear her let out a breath. She walks briskly, trying but not quite succeeding not to run, to him. He holds open his arms and she falls into what is obviously a familiar embrace. I turn and walk swiftly away from this scene, into the building.

My heart pounding in my ears.

I stand at a porthole and watch. I can see her searching the collection of people for me as they prepare to leave. As much as I want to talk to her one last time. I can't bear the polite goodbye in front of this man who seems to have everything my heart desires.

She gives up and they enter the shuttle. I stand and watch until it becomes a tiny dot, finally disappearing into the clouds. I hold my breath, waiting for my life without her to begin.

THE END!I love feedback! 


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